holy shit balls fuck.
i don't even know what to do or say right now.
I'm so i don't even know. my head feel so floaty.\
thoughts scattered. trains off track.
i don't think i pissed him off. i really don't think he cared.
she wanted it.
she asked for it.
from the start.
i picked her signals up
even if she didn't put them there.
i read her. i got it. i felt it.
a connection. wanting needing
to venture farther. deeper. inside.
held her hand. she embraced mine
brushed my fingers across her face
her neck.her hair. made her gasp.
but she hit my weak spot dead on. perfectly .
how could i not stop. was it natural.
what is she thinking. did i fuck it up.
did i cross this line. did i fool around too far.
she held my hand. ran her palm down my jawbone my neck.
she placed my arm around her.
she cuddled up to me.
it wont go anywhere. it cant.
I'm not a home wrecker. I'm not one to destroy.
but it was safe. it was all go. he was all with it.
I'm sure i aroused him more when i kissed her
deeply. ? I'm unsure. i couldn't think.
thinking was past me. my heart was
beating to loud to bother listening to my brain
not fast. just loud. I'm surprised at how calm
maintained the situation. her fingers petting
the small of my back
i cant help my jolty moves. every now and again.
i lost it. control. shes touching me
I'm holding her. shes falling
in and out of consciousness. floating away.
how can it mean anything
I'm just being crushed on.
my only responsibility is to
leave this place in good working order and make sure i make no bad blood.
which i haven't. but Ive been kind of sloppy as of late
but they say I'm just really chill and almost ot easy.
but fuck you all. she went down my pants. first. touched me there. first.
she went there. i let her taste a little .
i didn't want her to rush it.
but my pants came this close to .
dropping off.
mm mm, now my brain is filed with wickedness.
my head can't be clear. I'm so fuzzy. inside i feel odd
strangely funny. in a good way .i feel like i
have never done that in my life.
thrilling. exciting. what i live for,
and the whole make a straight girl kiss me.
and have crush on me. not even made her do that.
she pulled that one on her own.
what dose it mean. she want to go more. farther.
i want more. i sure hope i left her wanting more.
the crazy shit i get into .
the insane stuff i can get away with.
the way i can wrap peoplea round my finger.
oh to be jazz is quite wonderful
and i freaking love being single.
