Sitting Waiting

i look outside
at the whole world
running around searching
and looking for purpose

its like were chasing
away the dreams
and the memories
that scar us

In the deepest cut
that we have felt
from the painful honestly
we go thru

And then we have to
cover it all up
With fakeness and masks
And pertend everything is alright

I want everything to
be true and honest
and open and new
I want to start now

I fear that i wont
be accepted in this
in who i am becasue
no one understands

i live my life symbolically
and i plan every aspect
even if it dosent need planning
it keeps me occupied

I do more than just words
i draw out my soul
i sketch my feelings
i rip out my heart

and set it on a silver platter
for her that walked away from me
And now i cant put it back in
She took it and ran

So now when the darkness ver comes
I am left wiht nothing but
the feelings of emptiness
thats pick at my being

and this is when i sit
at my window
for hours on end
in the silence

that haunts us when we wake
but comforts us when we sleep
In the muted everyday noise
That we hear but pay nothing

Everything so calm and controlled
and everything so easy and nice
a parade that cannot be rained on
the rain is only falling on me